Opinion: ProJared and the Destruction of an Idol

“Don’t meet your heroes.” That is a phrase that I hear very often online. They say that, because often times people that you idolize may have it revealed that they are, in actuality, quite terrible people. I never really adhered too much to this idea because I was confident that the people I admired, while most likely hiding some things away, were good people at heart. Then, I found out about something that ProJared, one of my heroes, did. To say I was emotionally devastated would be a gross understatement to my current state of mind.

For those who are unaware, Jared “ProJared” Knabenbauer is a YouTuber who creates videos of himself reviewing various video games. The videos are either condensed into a minute or a more in-depth format. Before the controversy, he was part of a group of similar content creators called NormalBoots, and had approximately a million subscribers on his own channel.

A week ago, at the time of this writing, he announced via his page on Twitter that he was divorcing his wife, a cosplayer by the name of Heidi O’Ferrall. His original statement on Twitter made it seem as if it was a mutual and amicable matter. However, O’Ferrall published a large thread of tweets the same day and the day after, detailing some rather damning accusations.

O’Ferrall claims ProJared was engaging in a sexual affair with another cosplayer, Holly Conrad, and soliciting and exchanging illicit photos from fans on a Tumblr blog. Some of those fans were, reportedly, as young as 16 years old. O’Ferrall claims that the proof of this affair comes from photos and text messages taken off of ProJared’s old phone, and since she has made her accusations, a number of the aforementioned illicit photos have been leaked to the internet. Though the existence of the photos doesn’t prove they were sent to minors, it does prove he engaged in the activity.

Since then, the public backlash has been severe on Knabenbauer’s end. He has since lost nearly 200,000 subscribers from his channel, NormalBoots has ceased all professional contact with him and his fanbase, and the internet at large have completely turned their backs on him. He has even had his ability to moderate his own subreddit revoked. At the moment of writing, he has not made any form of official statement on any platform, his only Tweet being of a completely unrelated event.

This news was incredibly painful for me to hear. ProJared was an idol to me among content creators of YouTube. I found his style of content to be entertaining and coherent, and I consider him to be one of the influencers of my style of writing and presentation. He exposed me to some of my now favorite video games, such as Monster Hunter and Stardew Valley.

Now I know that he is, more than likely, quite an unpleasant person. I felt so hollow from such a figurative betrayal. I think this is why you’re told to never meet your heroes: because more often than not, it will be revealed that they are as human and as ugly on the inside as you or I. They will make mistakes and they will feel even worse coming from a field of adoration.

So, yeah, don’t meet your heroes.